There is more going on than I know how to put words to. The wildfires have ravaged Los Angeles. My home and family are safe, but I could see the flames glowing six miles north of me, which was beyond bizarre and disorienting. I know more dear friends than I would like who have lost … Continue reading Persevering through Hard Seasons as a Nurse
grief
The Perils of Rushed Listening and Overeager Attempts to Fix Grief
The other day, I met up for a casual coffee with a lovely friend who is not in the healthcare realm. As it goes in catching up with friends, I was trying to give the summarized version of how life has been this past year on both a personal and professional level. I briefly alluded … Continue reading The Perils of Rushed Listening and Overeager Attempts to Fix Grief
Self Care: The Value of Solitude and Introspection
In all my 14 years of PICU nursing, I've never quite experienced the overlapping volume and intensity of suffering, moral distress amongst nurses, death, and anger from patients' families that our unit experienced this past August - October. The bike accident that snuffed out a teenage life in a moment. The newly diagnosed cancer patient … Continue reading Self Care: The Value of Solitude and Introspection
Podcast Episode with Muted in Medicine: Professional Grief
I so loved this podcast conversation with Saba Fatima, a pediatrician I had the joy of getting to know through the Columbia University Narrative Medicine certification program. Our shared love of pediatrics, storytelling and preserving humanity in healthcare really bonded us as we dove into this conversation about professional grief, for her incredible new podcast, … Continue reading Podcast Episode with Muted in Medicine: Professional Grief
A Different Kind of Expertise for a Different Kind of Healing
The baby came to us from another hospital with multi-layered complications since her premature birth. Her dad was absent, and her mom had two and a half strikes working against her in life. The other hospital had reached its limit in what they could do for the baby, so they sent the baby to us. … Continue reading A Different Kind of Expertise for a Different Kind of Healing
What is Professional Grief?
I had a wonderful podcast interview last week with a pediatrician who wanted to explore the topic of professional grief in healthcare, and that made me think it would be good to write a new post with some refreshed thoughts on the topic. What are we referring to when we talk about professional grief? There … Continue reading What is Professional Grief?
Reflections on Becoming Patient and Caregiver: One Year in Retrospect
It was about a year ago that I moved from the acute phase of breast cancer treatment to long-term hormone therapy. I was relieved to be done with the hardest physical interventions of surgery and radiation, and also so scared about what the hormone changes might do to my mind and heart. Little did I … Continue reading Reflections on Becoming Patient and Caregiver: One Year in Retrospect
The Story of the One Loved
You were conceived, and your mother loved you immediately with her whole heart. In your earliest days, your hair and your face would already be programmed to take on much of your mother’s likeness. But something in your nascent genetics would also go quietly awry, taking you and your mom on a trajectory that some … Continue reading The Story of the One Loved
The Tensions We Constantly Navigate as Healthcare Workers
My therapist recently noted how much inner work and wrestling I must be constantly doing as a nurse, without being fully aware of what is rumbling underneath the surface. Today I find myself feeling really tender, and I’ve got a feeling it’s because of the recent accumulation of patient stories that have gone unpacked, evoking … Continue reading The Tensions We Constantly Navigate as Healthcare Workers
FREE 7-Day E-Devotional: Gritty Gospel-Based Reflections for Nurses in the Trenches
As a Christian pediatric ICU nurse who has seen all the terrible things, I can’t stomach platitudes, including Christian platitudes. Those who have followed my writing here know that I have spent a lot of time wrestling with questions like "Where is God in the PICU - cases of injustice" and issues such as the … Continue reading FREE 7-Day E-Devotional: Gritty Gospel-Based Reflections for Nurses in the Trenches
The Heart of Nursing 