“What would you do, doctor?” The family had been explicit in wanting straightforward communication about their child, whose neurological disease had progressed to the point where she was continually seizing, despite every medication the physicians had tried. The seizures were in turn damaging her brain, such that she was minimally responsive to stimuli and was … Continue reading The Ethical Use of our Therapeutic Connections with Patients’ Families
trust
Walking Closely with Families: A Letter
A letter to my long time patient’s mom — You were trapped in the fishbowl of our ICU. You went from a numb stare to near catatonic with grief to terse and closed in to opening your door a crack to pouring your heart out, telling me stories, speaking of fears and hopes and uncertainties … Continue reading Walking Closely with Families: A Letter
When Vaccine-Skeptic Friends Reached Out for Medical Advice: A Story of Hope in Tumultuous Times
At the start of this politically tumultuous 2025, I felt I needed to learn to have conversations with people who think very differently than me. As strong as my convictions were about plenty of things, I knew I needed to remember the humanity of people who have vastly different perspectives than mine. I also frankly … Continue reading When Vaccine-Skeptic Friends Reached Out for Medical Advice: A Story of Hope in Tumultuous Times
A Different Kind of Expertise for a Different Kind of Healing
The baby came to us from another hospital with multi-layered complications since her premature birth. Her dad was absent, and her mom had two and a half strikes working against her in life. The other hospital had reached its limit in what they could do for the baby, so they sent the baby to us. … Continue reading A Different Kind of Expertise for a Different Kind of Healing
The Privilege of Entering into Patient Stories
We’d never talked. She only knew I was one of the other nurses in the ICU. I knew she was the mom of the kid everyone was concerned about. She was leaning on a countertop, motionless and alone, while the whole medical team was in motion in her child’s room. I approached her, and lightly … Continue reading The Privilege of Entering into Patient Stories
Asking Beautiful New Questions as a Seasoned Nurse
Having worked in my current PICU for a little over 13 years now, I find that it’s easy for me to get comfortable with the way I’ve learned to go about things, without taking moments to approach my practice with a more curious, teachable heart. I’m discovering how refreshing it can be when I remember … Continue reading Asking Beautiful New Questions as a Seasoned Nurse
Part One of Three: Personal Spiritual Wrestlings as a Cancer Patient
I have wrestled with spiritual questions a good deal as the nurse bearing witness to my patients' stories over the years. In that, I have often wondered about the intricacies of how my patients' families process their experience of significant illness in a loved one. This year, with my own breast cancer diagnosis, I learned … Continue reading Part One of Three: Personal Spiritual Wrestlings as a Cancer Patient
the liminal space of serious illness with good prognosis
I'm strong and frail Depending on who is asking Who is listening to the text and subtext And who is listening only for what they are listening for . Who catches the hesitations in my sentences The eyes dropped at a certain moment The laughter I offer To ease our tension To assure us we … Continue reading the liminal space of serious illness with good prognosis
On Humility and Reading the Room
Yesterday I was talking with another nurse about a wonderfully vivacious coworker who used to work night shift in our unit years ago. She had a way about her where she could create easy conversation with any patient and family member, shine a bright smile and lighten the mood of just about any room. We … Continue reading On Humility and Reading the Room
New Blog Post for AJN: Primary Nursing of Medically Complex Children in the ICU Increases Parental Trust
I’ve been wanting to write about the experiences and struggles the healthcare community can face when we take care of medically complex kids who often have severe developmental disabilities. This blog post for American Journal of Nursing is finally that post, with a lot of vulnerable honesty. But the blessing here is that I am … Continue reading New Blog Post for AJN: Primary Nursing of Medically Complex Children in the ICU Increases Parental Trust