We had all just started our shift when the code bells alarmed. We ran to the room, and someone was already performing CPR. After several rounds, our Attending Physician sadly announced the time of death and we braced ourselves for the mom's agonizing screams. Our chaplain, social worker, respiratory therapist, care partners, and physician colleagues … Continue reading Sharing in the Loneliness of Extraordinary Suffering: A Nurse’s Quiet Burden
communication
Healthcare Workers are from Mars, Patients and Families are from Venus
Earlier this week, a panel of colleagues at my hospital participated in an Ethics Grand Rounds where they discussed the topic, "When Parents Question Our Expertise: Trust Alliance, and Boundaries in Pediatric Care." As you can imagine, the conversation was full of stories about tensions with patients' family members, personal/shared struggles when we feel fractures … Continue reading Healthcare Workers are from Mars, Patients and Families are from Venus
Grief as a Teacher (revisited)
In my TEDTalk from 2017, I made a comment about grief being a powerful teacher. I've been asked for elaboration on this statement a number of times since then, and I always pause in my response because I know it's true, but it's deep and difficult to explain on the spot. But it deserves a … Continue reading Grief as a Teacher (revisited)
Walking Closely with Families: A Letter
A letter to my long time patient’s mom — You were trapped in the fishbowl of our ICU. You went from a numb stare to near catatonic with grief to terse and closed in to opening your door a crack to pouring your heart out, telling me stories, speaking of fears and hopes and uncertainties … Continue reading Walking Closely with Families: A Letter
The Living Components of the Healthcare System
*This post is adapted from an article I wrote for our pediatric ICU's quarterly newsletter. Being a healthcare worker involves increasingly more than caring for the physical patients and their parents. It also involves giving attention to the system as a ‘patient’ of sorts, with its own temperament, ailings and needs. What’s curious is that … Continue reading The Living Components of the Healthcare System
Participate in the Survey for Grief Sensitive Healthcare Project
"What do I even do as the nurse with this devastated family right now?" When I was in nursing school, I didn't receive any formal training in how to sit with deeply grieving patients and families. I remember one brief exercise in empathy during an ethics class, where my classmates and I awkwardly role-played and … Continue reading Participate in the Survey for Grief Sensitive Healthcare Project
A Story About Paying Attention
If I may be perfectly honest with you, I love lighter nursing shifts. Maybe because they are so few and far between in our PICU. Maybe because my to-do list with work and extracurricular nursing projects is never-ending, so I welcome any down time I have in my shifts to chip away at those, rather … Continue reading A Story About Paying Attention
When Vaccine-Skeptic Friends Reached Out for Medical Advice: A Story of Hope in Tumultuous Times
At the start of this politically tumultuous 2025, I felt I needed to learn to have conversations with people who think very differently than me. As strong as my convictions were about plenty of things, I knew I needed to remember the humanity of people who have vastly different perspectives than mine. I also frankly … Continue reading When Vaccine-Skeptic Friends Reached Out for Medical Advice: A Story of Hope in Tumultuous Times
In Times of Overwhelm as a Nurse, Begin with One Intentional Act at a Time
One of the most difficult things about trying to be empathetic, engaged and informed with all that has been going on with both our local Los Angeles wildfire devastation as well as our country's political chaos, is the utter overwhelmedness of so many very serious issues to grapple with all at once. I think most … Continue reading In Times of Overwhelm as a Nurse, Begin with One Intentional Act at a Time
The Christmas Hospital Story that Stays With Me
Weary and slightly bewildered from an unexpected month in the hospital, her eyes also shone with eagerness and relief that they were one big step away from going home, just in time for Christmas. But it was her poise that stood out to me. A quiet strength that carried the unbelievable story of an athlete … Continue reading The Christmas Hospital Story that Stays With Me
The Heart of Nursing 